That Kabaddi Match

 Note- The following blog is the work of wild figments of author and not an accurate portrayal of a real event.

Part 1

“You should be ready in 15 minutes,” Our PTI said, “Otherwise I am going to have them leave.”

“No, Sir we should manage,” Akshay replied.

“Of course, we will be ready in 15 minutes!” Himanshu said as seriously as he could. “Although I can’t guarantee him.”

“Hey, old man should worry for themselves first.” Akshay fired back.

“15 minutes that’s it”, PTI warned once again.

Akshay and Himanshu - the two concerned students of our class, I too was one among them.   

These were the last days of us in the school, intermediate exams were some 4 months away and the atmosphere was super serious around us. So, opportunities like these where we were allowed to play with some other team were rare, although we never missed a chance of playing in the PE period or in a vacant period - all thanks to Himanshu’s wit. This time we had a match with another school’s Kabaddi team. We were not good in the Kabaddi, and that team which happened to be our PTI’s last school team had already beaten the best team of our school. So we were already aware of the result, although we pretended as if we still had the chance to clench a miraculous win, Adult Fantasy - My God.

After that concerned students from our class, of course I was the one, huddled quickly and started making the team’s prefecture - Aksahay, Himanshu, Shivam, Ankur, Parnav and Tushar.

“What aren’t you playing?” Himanshu asked.

“No, I have an ankle sprain.” Tushar replied shyly, like it was his own mistake.

So, the best player from our class, an innate athlete, Tushar - had already given up which was the first shock for the team. Recently, in a fierce battle (don’t mistake it with a quarrel or a fight) in a Kabaddi match many of our player had injured, Tushar was one among them, others were Sagar (not me), Ankit Gujjar, Saarth, Sanoj, and Suraj.

“That means we are short of one player.” Himanshu said, again in a very concerned look.

“Where are Ankit, Ujjawal, and Suraj.” Akshay inquired. “They will fill the one position.”

“You think that they will come out  of that hot class for a Kabaddi match, Forget that.” Ankit Gujjar had immediately exterminated the idea.

“Where is Parnav, by the way?” Ankur inquired, he too had a concerned look on his face.

“He is changing under the tree.” Tushar replied.

“The battle suit. He is the only one who could destroy them.” Sarth exclaimed.

In this conundrum situation where we were sort of players, our players lacked fighting spirit and a formidable enemy who had already defeated the best team of the school was waiting for us, two of our concerned students - Himanshu and Akshay - started fighting for the captainship.

The game was about to start, PTI was constantly asking us to be hurry - such a pain in the ass. Grasping the situation two students - of course, juniors, had offered their helping hands to complete our team. Thank God! they saved us, otherwise we were about to go to the court with 4 players and 2 captains.

So, in that way our unskilled team having two captains and two outsiders, started moving their butts into the Kabaddi court. Yes, our inner was shacking, and we were out of spirit and hope, but not our body, we acted as if we were the champions there. We were the great pretenders.  

“Hey, you,” PTI said pointing at me. “You aren’t allowed to play in school dress.”

“Me Sir,” I said.

“Yes, you” PTI said very generously. “Beta, at least, change the shirt. It looks bad, you know.”

“Yes, Sir.” I had no choice, but to follow his order. So I ran down to the school and somehow managed to get school’s Kabaddi sport shirt, I rented it from someone who had rented that from someone else. It was filled with smells of different types of sweat which nearly killed me, but I had no choice.

As I returned to the ground, the game was already on the verge of starting. The second junior was on the court in my place. Captain no.1 - Akshay called me and said me that this junior is a real good player. So he can’t throw him out. He promised to substitute me soon in someone’s place. I agreed. I was relieved, because I was afraid. Although I still wanted to play, but that’s was OK with me.

The coin was flipped in the court, the opponent team won the toss, they decided to raid first (this was like deciding to bat first).

It was decided that we should start defensive, so the first raid, in any case, must be an empty raid. This was the only plan in the entire game our team had executed well. The raider went back empty handed, our first and only victory in the game.

This was our turn for the raid, Parnav was ready to start it, but our captain duo - Himanshu and Akshay, had something else in their mind. According to them sending Parnav in a defense of 7 would be dangerous, so better send someone else and make a chance for Parnav for a great raid when there were less than 5 players in the opposite side of the court. The plan was spectacular. But Parnav denied, he was desperate to raid the first one. And there was a reason behind that.

Before you know the reason, I want to tell you who Parnav is like. Physically he is a perfect cast for the role of asur in Raavana’s army - build-hairy body, joint eyebrows, a solid-little belly, and a taciturn look, having nothing but power of muscle in mind. So, I would say - Parnav was the only guy in the class who had the capability or say power to create a real pain in the asses of the opponent team.

The simple but interesting story - why Parnav want to raid the very first raid - is:

Parnav was a child then, and there was summer holidays, he used to play the whole day. But one day in the evening, his grandfather - Bijapal Babaji- caught him while he was on his way to play outside. He forced him to bring him his mathematics book. Parnav hated studying - Math in particular, moreover he hated to study in the evening, and who the hell in this world study in the summer break.

“My friend had borrowed my mathematics book from me before summer break,” Parnav made a really good excuse.

“What, from you!” Grandfather said almost surprised.

“Yes!” Parnav had played his cards.

“Then bring a copy and a pen - I will dictate you a sum by myself.” Grandfather was a retired teacher and he knows all the wits and excuses of children. He played his cards now.

“Babaji, please let me play, my friends are waiting for me. Today, is a very important match. They will lose it without me.” Parnav begged.

“Bring the copy!”

Parnav know he had no choice but to follow his grandfather’s order. He went to his room bought a copy and a pen, taking the maximum time he could.

“OK, you are in 6^th standard, aren’t you?” Grandfather asked in a teacher’s voice.

“Hmm,” Parnav hissed.

Then grandfather gave him a question on proportion which was: “Abhishek has 12 mangoes and he want to sell them in 50 rupees, but Ramesh wants only 4. How much Ramesh should pay to Abhishek for 4 mangoes.”

“Babaji! We had not taught these type problems until now.” Parnav complained.

“Then what the hell they teaches you in 6^th standard. This is a simple proportion sum, just do it, and stop whining already, I am not going to let you go before solving this problem. So better concentrate on this problem than on excusing me.”

After reading the problem thrice he get nothing but questions like - why Ramesh want to buy only 4 mangoes, and who in this world buy mangoes in numbers and not in kilograms, and whether the mangoes ripe or unripe - if they are unripe then 50 rupees for 12 mangoes would be more, so Ramesh will need to bargain in that case. Actually, for Parnav the answer of this question were in these question and not in the mathematics.

Bemused, he asked at last - “Babaji, Are those mangoes ripe or unripe. And do tell me the species too - Dashari, Tapka, Chosa or something like this.”

The Grandfather was already expecting these questions from his grandson, he smiled and said, “First solve this question. I will tell you about that later.”

Determined, once again, to solve the question, Parnav started reading the question again. He read the question, then reread it, and then again he did the same. But even after 5 minutes of doing the same, he was totally confused in deciding whether the question is from the realm of subtraction, addition, multiplication or division or did he had to solve it by applying all these things altogether. When all his efforts failed, he said almost crying, “I can’t Grandfather. I want to go play outside. I promise I will do it later.”

But Grandfather listened noting of Parnav, and in that way Parnav was forced to spent that whole Summer Holiday evening solving the problem of Abhishek and Ramesh. This is after that day he began to hate all people with those two names. Weird, but true. So, if your name is one of them, don’t go in front of Parnav, he will exterminate you even on the cost of his own life. Well, I am telling you this story because the opponent captain’s name was Abhishek.   

 

“Hey, what are you doing?” PTI said. “That’s your raid, be quick,”

“Sir, one second we are making strategy.” Captain no.1 and 2 replied in one tone.

“What strategy, it looks like a quarrel or something.”

“You know Sir, that’s the strategy.” Himanshu, the Captain no.2 said with a grin on his face, the victory grin. When it comes to sarcastic argument - our class was an inevitable champion.

After about two minute of argument both Captains somehow managed to agree Parnav on their decision, the two junior players helped them, and it was decided that Captain no.1 - Akshay - would raid the first raid from our side. He said he would not take a risk (like he could). From there on, those two outsiders were the chief advisor of the team. So from then we were the team of 2 captains, a runner-cum-wrestler (Ankur), a half-assed freaky man, and two chief advisor; we were playing the Kabaddi. Akshay was ready to raid. He took a deep breathe and looked to the other side.

 

The other end of the court, the enemy side, comprising of tall muscled mans, one of whom I doubted to their coach or PTI, but he wasn’t, he was the player. One was like - a criminal just released from the prison, his eyes red with blood, thick-filthy beard, that was horrific. One was lanky but tall, and one like ghost from those Hollywood horror movies - terse, pale and unusually deformed face, dropping dead eyes, pointed nose and sunken cheeks; Tushar said he looked funny but for me he was no less than horrific; so only one of them was like the normal school boy - their captain, Abhishek, of course.

 

Akshay took the first step and then cautiously second, then third and then a step back and then second step back and did the same thing again while chanting Kabaddi regularly. After about 15 seconds he returned, and we think we had successfully executed the second strategy of the game. But PTI blowed the whistle and gave a point to the opponent team, meaning - Akshay, our Captain no.1, was out. He said, Akshay had never crossed the Baulk line so technically he was out. Plan no.2 had failed.

What baulk line, I was wondering, because in all those years I had played Kabaddi I had never listened the name of that type of rule. Players from our side start arguing - this is the baulk line and that is the footprint, so he had crossed it.

NO, this one is the baulk line and this is not his foot, but this one, he had not crossed the baulk line - PTI argument.

The argument went for about 5 minutes and PTI forced his decision on us.

“That PTI bastard is taking his old school’s side.” Shivam commented in rage, and everybody agreed unanimously.

So, by that time our team rather than having players had two captains(one of them was out of court), a freaked man, a wrestler-cum-racer, two advisor, and many critiques. And our job was not playing but - arguing and criticizing. And we were playing Kabaddi.

The next raid from opponent’s side, it was their captain. Parnav was never be active in defense before but this time he jumped out from behind and jumped over to the Captain, Ankur run to help him grab, seeing the possibility of a successful tackle Captain no.2 from the other end rushed for the tackle but somehow that man, their Captain, had managed to escape. 3 more were out. Now, there were only three players on our side of court - two advisor and Shivam. In next raid one among two advisor delivered an empty raid. Next raid was again by the opponent’s captain, Parnav argued to revive him immediately and then he would tell that bastard captain how much it cost of 4 mangoes. They took his words very seriously and in the same raid all were get out in an effort to grab the opponent’s captain. So finally Parnav was back on the court. Our score after 6 minutes of play was 9-0, who the hell was that time keeper, it was hardly 3 minutes of play.

Parnav was at last ready to raid from our side, we cheered him up, Sanoj shouted in great excitement, “ Chal Parnav g**** m*** le inki.”

Excited and burnt Parnav went for the raid. I was sure if anyone in our class able to create a pain in the asses of the opponent’s team, it was none other than Parnav. He cautiously started the raid from the left side, went up to the middle block, then back to the side blocks near to the side lobby, then he ran towards middle block again, but the lanky one who was standing in the middle block jumped on Parnav’s leg and then others too jumped over Parnav immediately. The monster from our side was exterminated. We were shocked. The man whom we had hoped should kick the opponent’s butts, was himself being kicked on his own butts. We were surprised, he was on fire. The score was 10-0. We - the team with two captains, one freaked man, many critiques,two advisor, and one wrestler-cum-runner had yet to open our account. We were playing the Kabaddi.

 

To Be Continued…

Last Words - Akshay, Himanshu, Tushar, Parnav, Ankur, Sagar, Ritik, Sarth, Sanoj, Suraj and all others, you are my heroes, remember that. Sorry, if I anyhow through my writing had hurt you.